check it out our google latitudes are spooning
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
