she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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