I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
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