Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
