Buhtt sex?
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
