You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
