This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
