What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Randomize
