I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
