we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
