i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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