I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
