is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
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