How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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