How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
