An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
