I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize