I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He is an equal opportunity slut.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
