too bad you live with your parents still
it hurts more in the daytime
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm too high and old for this...
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
