Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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