I'm really into asian looking animals
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
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