Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
