Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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