I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
