So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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