I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
