You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize