Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize