I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
