Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize