shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
