Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
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