my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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