i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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