Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Randomize
