If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
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