why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Randomize