i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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