Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
Randomize
