Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I would fuck him just for his dog
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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