Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
