puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
