how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Dignity is for republicans.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
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