I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
