A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
where does the pee come out of this thing
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
