So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
