the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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