she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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