i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Is it because I queefed?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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