Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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